We all seek to find balance amongst our various responsibilities.
It is easier said than done.
My colleague Anne and I caught up after work hours on Monday. Anne thanked me for always being available to her. I told her this – “Anne, Yep! I am always available to you. Because, you are one of my favorite girls. Moreover, over the years, I have learnt there is no such thing as work life balance for me. There is ONLY work life blend.” Anne agreed with me and appreciated my observation.
I have all kinds of asks of myself and my life. For example, I don’t believe in not showing up to one the boys concert during work hours. I also don’t believe in not working after I get back home because there should be supposedly be clear boundaries between work and life.
Given the contradictory asks that I have of myself and my life, I do what works for me.
I huddle with my colleagues both during and after work hours to make progress on projects.
I start meetings early or leave late during weekdays…whatever works on that day.
I gain permission (by building trust) to reach colleagues when I have to.
I give colleagues permission to call me when they have to.
I routinely pour over work stuff during the weekends.
I want my boss and colleagues to know that I will always rock heaven, deep earth and everything in between to keep moving the ball forward on all my projects…no matter what the odds.
I also show up to most of the boys events….even if it means showing up a few minutes late.
The boys are elated to see me when I rush in to a performance hall or tournament and wave my hand crazily at them.
I want them to know that they are very important to me…and I will always show up to cheer and support them…no matter what the odds.
In my current state of life, given my varying responsibilities, there can’t be clear boundaries between work and life. If I want to be able to be a parent and an employee, I can’t balance…I need to blend.
Think about it. What works for you?
Whether it is work life balance or work life blend…you do what is right for YOU.
It will all work (pun intended) out eventually!
This post is dedicated to all sports-loving-halves and sports-hating-halves-in-any-relationship.
Kumar has been telling me that there is a “BIG” release at work this last weekend.
After all these years with me, he fails to realizes how much I know (with my extensive reading and limited training) about psychology and reading both digital and body language (right to the eye movements!).
It is Saturday morning.
I am bustling around the Kumar household.
Getting things in order for the post-spring-break-back-to-routine storm that is going to hit us in a couple of days.
I make him a big cup of coffee to help him with handling the “BIG” release.
He is intently focused on his laptop.
His headphones on.
His phone beside him.
See. To the untrained eye, it is so easy to buy the “BIG” release story. Is it not?
You don’t have to tell me.
I know. It is CRICKET. It is a “BIG” match.
So, I let him be.
I even humor him and endearingly ask him about “How is the release proceeding? Hope it is not too stressful.”
P.S. Don’t tell him I know about the fact that the “BIG” release = some completely — USELESS cricket match that India might be losing. Let the poor fellow be.
Several years ago, in the process of motivating him, I drew a chart.
X axis: Years
Y axis: Delta of what Adi knows and what Amma knows
The graph looked like this.
Even during those years, I knew his EQ was very high compared to mine. So, I didn’t dare to draw any charts about that.
I explained to him that he had to work hard and work smart to beat me. To target to cross the zero-point of the delta and into the positive territory.
My arrogance and my complete lack of knowledge of raising kids lead me to believe that it might take him a few decades to cross the zero-point.
Little did I know.
Nowadays, not a day goes by, that I stand humbled.
Today, he brought home something in Spanish. It looks like Greek and Latin (pun intended) to me. I am sure whatever he has written is great. I just don’t understand it.
Given his EQ, I know he will never draw a graph show Delta of what Amma knows and what Adi knows.
Which zone are you in? Positive or Negative?