Turning Cynic?

I can feel it.
I can feel it crawling on me.

When I look back, I think 2017 might stand out as the year…that I started turning cynical.

I kid you not.
Slowly and steadily, my cynic index is growing.

Take for example, yesterday evenings happenings.

Kumar didn’t return home travel until later in the night.
I was holding down the fortress for a couple of days.
Work. Meetings. Deliverables. Kids. Chores. Breakfast. Pick up. Drop off. Carpools. And more.
Rear-ended on Tuesday evening. Back ache due to the impact. Car wouldn’t start on Wednesday morning.

So, yesterday evening. I drive away from our neighborhood for some chores.
It is drizzling.
The road is pitch dark.
Out of nowhere two unleashed dogs run through the road.
One is brown in color. The other one is dark.

I have to pause here.
Let me give you a backstory.

My driving instinct is not something that I learnt in the last 15 years.
The killer instinct on when to run and when to stop…was all fun tuned and became muscle memory from years of boarding overcrowded public buses that wouldn’t stop in the designated stops in my hometown Chennai.

I had to time it all like an Olympic athlete would.
I had to start running when I saw the bus far away.
The bus would keep moving. I had to pick up speed, hop on the bus and bring my body to a full stop.
Can you picture that? Can you picture your body doing that?
It is very hard to understand and appreciate if you have’t done it.

So, starting, speeding up and stopping are all instinctual to me and my body.

So, when I saw the dogs, I braked and didn’t move until I saw the running unleashed dogs pass me by safely.

I am thankful for that. Killing a life form (whatever form it is in) is a crime.

Here is what happened next.
The woman who owned the 2 dogs didn’t seem to care at all.
She didn’t come by and say “Sorry, I should have leashed them. I put you and your kids in risk by my bad choice”.

She didn’t even say “Thanks for saving my dogs by driving safely and braking at the right moment!”.

I truly want to see the goodness in people.
But, between the Mexico theft, the rear-ender fleeing the scene and the thankless dog owner….I think I have just about had it.

I have lost all hope with humanity as of yesterday evening.

It is official. I am a cynic.

Bring it on.

Also published on Medium.

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